Family disciplinary practices have been a controversial topic of debate for centuries, and they are known to have a lifelong effect on the wellbeing of children.
This Families Commission report provided a snapshot of the views, experiences and practices of a sample 100 New Zealand families, relating to the discipline of their pre-school children. Parents and caregivers were asked what they believed about discipline, how they disciplined their children and the type of support and stress that they experienced with parenting. The study also looked at the effect of child and family characteristics and context, over time, on discipline.
The project used a semi-structured method, with parents keeping diaries of their day to day disciplinary practices. Most parents in the sample viewed discipline as a means of teaching children about the boundaries of appropriate and inappropriate behaviour, though about a third identified discipline with punishment. The majority of parents were authoritative in their approach to parenting, combining warmth with firm boundaries. About one in 10 parents described themselves as taking a permissive approach and an even smaller minority (3.4 percent) said they used authoritarian methods (demanding obedience without explanation). While more than a third of parents interviewed said that they smacked, our diary data suggest that this use was very infrequent.
Within Aotearoa New Zealand a change seems to be occurring whereby violence against children within the family is far less tolerated than it used to be. While over a third of those surveyed still used physical punishment, there were very few participants in our study who were positive about its use. This change could be influenced by the wealth of literature concerning parenting techniques now available, from dedicated parenting magazines and internet resources through to television shows like ‘SuperNanny’. Recent initiatives at the government level include law changes such as the introduction of the Child Discipline Bill in 2007, and a media campaign against family violence, and may also be turning the tide.
Finally, professionals still play a critical role in shaping attitudes towards child discipline, with the support of ECE teachers and Plunket nurses especially valued. While we do have many parenting programmes in New Zealand, there is still a gap in access to good professional development programmes. It is vital that we retain and strengthen our commitment to the development of high-quality support services for children and families.
Purpose
This project is an empirical study (combining qualitative and quantitative methods) focusing on how families with young children approach the task of disciplining their children, the factors which influence their approach to discipline and the effect of past and current life contexts.
Research questions
- What do New Zealand families with children under five believe about appropriate Disciplinary practices for children?
- What are the range and typical uses of discipline in New Zealand families?
- How are families’ disciplinary practices influenced by their children’s age and other characteristics, their ethnicity, religion, income and family structure?
- How are families’ disciplinary practices influenced by context and events over time?
- What type of support (if any) do families receive for parenting their young children, and if they do get support, does it meet their needs?
Methodology
This research uses a multi-method approach, combining semi-structured interviews, parental diaries and a standardised measurement tool, the Parenting Daily Hassles scale. Both interviews and diaries provided data which were later analysed qualitatively and quantitatively. The Parenting Daily Hassles scale was a quantitative source of data, which enabled comparison with norms indicating the degree of stress being felt by samples of parents in the United Kingdom and the United States. This multi-method approach allows cross-validation and cross-fertilisation of research procedures, which add to the validity and richness of the research (Brewer & Hunter, 2006). The quantitative data were useful for providing the overall picture of the data, using descriptive statistics to look at central tendency and variation, and inferential statistics to look at the relationship between variables, and comparisons between subgroups within the sample. The qualitative data, on the other hand, focused on the meaning and perspectives of the parents who participated in the research (Denzin & Lincoln, 2000; Janesick, 2000). It sought to understand how parents made sense of their lives and experiences (Duncan, Bowden, & Smith, 2005) and to study in detail the processes and settings in which they participated, in order to understand their approach to family discipline (Graue & Walsh, 1998). Very few studies have gone beyond one-off reports from parents of remembered past events to access data on family discipline (Smith & Brooks-Gunn, 1997), so there are considerable methodological limitations with many previous studies (Benjet & Kazdin, 2003; Locke & Prinz, 2002; Pitzer, 1997). This study is more ecologically valid than many previous studies in this area, because parents provided us with immediate data in context and over time in the diaries, rather than relying completely on retrospective responses. In addition, the study provides triangulation (and helps to establish the validity of the research) by using different types of data – interview, diary and a standardised scale.
Key Results
Beliefs about discipline and influences on beliefs
Most parents believed that discipline means socialising children so that their behaviour falls within acceptable boundaries. Some parents associated discipline with the use of punishment to achieve control. The majority of parents said their approach was warm but firm, or a mixture of positive and negative sanctions, and very few parents said they used a purely authoritarian or permissive approach. Upbringing was a major influence on parenting, but written material, current family, the media and friends were also influential. One in three parents mentioned professionals (such as doctors) or their own professional education as important.
Disciplinary practices
Parents said that they commonly use positive reinforcement (rewards, praise and reasoning), structuring the situation (distraction) and punishment (time out, withdrawal of privileges, smacking and shouting) to control their children’s behaviour. Positive methods were, on the whole, thought to be effective for changing behaviour. More parents thought that time out was more effective than other forms of punishment, though withdrawal of privileges was also seen to be relatively effective. Only a small number of parents thought that smacking or shouting were effective disciplinary techniques, and most of those who did think smacking was effective used it infrequently and as a last resort (this was true of other punitive methods too). Diary records showed that parents commonly used structuring the situation (verbal instruction, distraction and removal of objects) positive reinforcement (rewards and praise), and reasoning to guide their children’s behaviour. About two thirds of parents gave verbal warnings and a third ignored inappropriate behaviour. The most common punishments were time out, verbal reprimands and withdrawal of privileges. Punishments were only used by about one in four parents over the diary periods, and positive methods were about three times as likely to be used. Very low levels of physical punishment were recorded in the diaries.
Child and family characteristics
Very few differences in disciplinary techniques or parenting hassles were associated with child and family characteristics. Older pre-school children were more likely to experience negative sanctions from parents than younger ones; parents on lower incomes had slightly more frequent and intense parenting hassles than those on higher incomes; single parents experienced more frequent and intense parenting hassles than parents in intact families; and larger families tended to use more negative and less neutral methods to control their children.
Stresses and context
Just over half of parents said they used the same disciplinary approaches in different contexts, but many participants found it difficult to maintain a consistent approach in different situations. Having a public audience (for example, when going to the supermarket) made it hard for parents to stay calm and consistent. Over three-quarters of parents raised issues that they considered to have affected their parenting; tiredness and workload were the most common. A large proportion of families are experiencing an above-average frequency of potential ‘hassles’ and the frequency of parenting hassles was higher among those reporting more experiences of stress. The intensity of parenting hassles was also higher – particularly among those who reported three or more stresses. The number of stresses showed no significant difference between the positive or negative discipline scores.
Support
Most parents in the study had at least three sources of support, including (most prominently) family, early childhood teachers and centres, friends and partners. Other professionals, such as Plunket nurses and doctors, played a role for about a third of parents. Books and written material were also mentioned by about a third of parents, and a further third had attended parenting courses. Parents who had more support used more positive disciplinary techniques, and parents who had less support used more negative techniques.
Conclusions and implications
The study suggests a more favourable picture of New Zealand parents’ disciplinary practice than previous research, showing that the majority of parents took an authoritative (firm but warm) approach. Parents reported that they predominantly used positive disciplinary methods such as praise and rewards, and while punitive methods such as smacking or shouting were used, they were much more infrequent. It may be that recent changes in the law, and public campaigns against family violence, are beginning to change the attitudes and practices of parents. Despite the strong influence of their own upbringing on parenting, there were various other important influences and sources of support and advice for parenting in most families. About one in 10 families lacked support, and could have benefited from more social contact and responsive services. Professionals who work with parents (such as early childhood teachers) would benefit from specific professional development programmes focused on discipline, and future media campaigns could help to continue to change attitudes towards more effective parenting and more rewarding family life.